hey, paddy.just... just. [patrick turns off the music]what are you doing? hello? hello?is this thing on? ahh! happy halloween, everybody! i just wanted to say thank you everyone for coming. this is mine and... ag, you know, agustin's party. we never have parties, but this year i was like "i wanna be a fun gay, and fun gays have parties." so this is my party!
what i wanna know, though, why is nobody singing karaoke? i mean, do people not sing karaoke anymore?that's so weird, right? well later we'll sing. but i just wanted tonight to say... thank you everyone for coming. i wanted to say all my friends are here. dom is here.you all know dom, right? he-man, master of the universe is here. dom is actually opening a restaurant. well, it's not really a restaurant, it's like a...
it's a chicken window. it's ahh... i don't know what that is. he's gonna sell windows out of his chickenand it's gonna be great. but he doesn't have any money. so if we could you excuse me, yes.thank you so much. i'm gonna take this hat, and we're gonna pass it around and we're gonna do a collection. like church. - so if you have bills you can just put it...- you don't have to do that, paddy. no, dom, shut up.i love you. i love your chicken.
just pass that shit around and we're gonna raise some money. and this is agustin! and he's here because he lives here.also because he looks amazing. and he called me clarissa dalloway earlier. so if anybody knows what that means, you can let me know. that would be great, but i want to talk toyou for real, agustin. would you put the drink down and look at me in the eyes. and i wanna say... excuse me, sorry. i'm really proud of you, because you havereally turned it around this year.
you've become thoughtful, and helpful, andyou take care of trans-kids and a rent check would be nice, but i'm notgonna push it, right? right? richie? richie knows. richie knows because richie, this is crazy,but richie actually picked agustin up off the street when he was on drugs. then that's because richie's such a good person,and i think that we should all raise a glass. if i could just, carrie, have your red punch. and raise a glass to richie, and don't thinki forgot about you. over there, laughing behind richie. that's brady.
uh, which turns out is richie's soulmate. so yeah, there's that. he's also, actually, i learned this evening...the gay dr ruth. so if anybody needs their truvada prescription filled [hiv treatment drugs] that ginger over there in the crown is the one you go to, alright? you go, you guys. cheers.and also to, while we're at it i'd like to raise a glass to my boss, kevin. kevin, hi!
look, owen, it's kevin and jon! his longtime boyfriend! isn't it great when two gay guys can justwork it out like that? i think it's amazing. so i just wanted to say, kevin, these lastfew weeks have been so special. in particular, that time a couple weeks agowhen we were alone at the office... no, no, no! i haven't gotten the chance no,i am gordon freeman, okay? he's the most popular video game character of all time! okay, gordon freeman! how do you people notknow that? you know who that is, right? make sure no one uploads any videos on youtube.[oh snap profondement!]
[music: see you by the 2 bears]- shit - motherfucker.- that was a train wreck. apparently, patrick's little breakdown onlygot us about what? $12, $13. it's okay. we can buy a new little chicken with it. our first chicken. where's malik? he is in the car. he's changing his shoes.he's kind of done with the whole cher thing. he's really great. you know that, right? oh, really? how do you...?what, did he rim you or something?
- no.- really? you gotta watch that guy. he loves ass. - he's all up in it.- doris. yeah, i know, okay? i know he's great.i know he's great. i know he's great. he's a little too great.it's scaring the shit out of me. i'm not... i don't like the whole couple'scostume thing too, i wish we hadn't done it. it's freaking me out.'cause sonny and cher? ugh. you know how that turned out. - well do you know what i think?- what? i think you two are great together.
- man. oh my god. yo, these shoes are no joke.
No comments:
Post a Comment